Monthly Archives: April 2014

When the Prose Becomes Poetry

3,300 words, give or take a few, of absolutely heart-wrenching prose written today. And it feels like I was writing poetry. So much of this story was pulled from my past and my passions that I don’t know if I’m going to release it as-is. Which is why it is now with my editor in the hopes that she can make it better.

I wrote today and I’m glad I did it. Now, to see if I can take parts of my heart off the page.



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Headaches and Haircuts

So, I think it would be fair to say that, when ones hair is doing physical harm to ones self, it is time to cut said hair off. Well, maybe not all of it, but enough to keep from causing further injury. Yesterday, as I was grooming as I am wont to do, I threw my neck out. I did this brushing my hair while wet. This ridiculous injury has caused no end of irritation and so today, I went and chopped the offending locks.

Well, I didn’t, the hairstylist did. And I think she was laughing when I told her what had happened. I left behind enough hair to cover a medium sized dog, or create the entirety of a small one, and felt a lot better.

I’d been threatening to cut the hair off for almost a year now. Every time I sat on it or caught it in the car door, I reached for the scissors, only to restrain myself because violence was not the answer. Except, really, it is. At least on that score.

Now, having been rid of the too-long hairs that were plaguing me, I feel lighter. That could also be the muscle relaxers.

Why muscle relaxers if I’d cut off what had put the most weight on the injury in my neck?

Because the first thing I did, upon reaching the car, was shut my hair in the door. So, probably no words tonight beyond this blog post, but hopefully a day off tomorrow and lots of words then.

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Filed under health, writing

The Feeling of Trudging Through Mud

So, I have a thing, which requires medication that I take on a daily basis, mostly at the same time each day. I ran out of my correct dosage on Sunday and couldn’t pick anymore up until today. There are so many ways to describe what I’m feeling; a car running with the gas light on, turtles stampeding through mud, pushing a rock up a hill for eternity.

Uh, no, I’m not Sisyphus, but today I have felt his pain and remembered what it was like before I got someone to listen to me. After being referred to multiple psychiatrists because my doctors kept telling me I was depressed, someone actually listened to my symptoms and did a blood test. Explanation for exhaustion and weight-gain found, I embarked on the daily regimen that keeps my muscles working and my blood moving.

I never want to get back to this place again.

Also, the family fighting stuff is hilarious when you’re not in the middle of it. I will write it all as a farce and publish it someday.

250 words written though God knows how I actually managed it. More tomorrow.

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Filed under weight loss, writing

Wherein It’s Been a Rough Day

And it really, really has. The weekend was great, with lots of time spent with the kiddos, and I was looking forward to a light week. I got a call from my mom just as I put my car in gear to get to work this morning. There’s been a death in the family. My decent week has transformed into one filled with angst and family stuff.

So, I’ve only done about 1,000 words on my next story today, though I’m going to try a few more before bed. Wish me luck.

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The One In Which I’m Late

Yes, I’m late tonight. For a couple reasons, one of which was I was righteously angry today which always screws up my mood. For a while there, I was seriously enjoying my bad mood and contemplating things which are best left to the horror stories I don’t actually write on purpose. It boils down to more drama with the day job (unless they’re providing me a TARDIS, which would be cool) but also ended up splashing on to somebody else.

Combined with an ouch bill for more repairs on my car and I ended up very nearly taking down somebody who’s telling a forum of people in various stages of success in their self-publishing careers that, don’t worry, it’s fun but you won’t make money at it. I corrected a few things in the post and then stepped back to let some of the old hands have at her. I felt kinda bad doing it but, hey, gotta learn somehow.

Spent some writing time at BK again and got about 2,000 more words written. Debating taking a benadryl for the allergy attack I’m suffering through or trying to push to the finish on this story.

What did you do today? Have you ever enjoyed a bad mood?

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Filed under ebook, writing

The Post I Make From My Tablet Because the Price of Gas Sucks

Yep, the price of gas sucks, and we only have one car at the moment, which means I’m writing this from a table at Burger King while I wait for someone to be done at work. Today started with two flat tires on the way to the kiddo’s spelling bee (where he placed 1st in his grade and 4th overall) which resulted in spending nearly 3 hours trying to get back on the road again. I got a little work done for the day job but mostly I sat and waited for people to work.

What did I do while I waited? Well, I read and I worked. As I read, I came across a new concept that I’d heard before but never had explained. It works out to a non-outline outline to help make writing go faster. I hate outlines with a passion but this seemed like something I could do. So, after finishing the story I’ve been working on in bits and pieces for a week, I sat down and did the non-outlines for the next 3 stories I want to do.

How did it work?

Well, granted that my words per minute sucks on the tablet, but less so than it did on the phone, and I’m happy to report that I’ve written 1,500 words in the last hour and a half.

It seems to be working, at least for now. So, once I get home, I’m going to see how much more I can get done before I have to go to bed tonight.

What did you do today? How have you turned a fail into a win recently? Let me know!

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Wherein I Wax Philosophical For a Few Moments

I wonder, sometimes, how much of our lives is passive. Where do we stop actively being a part of our day to day and just take what people hand us. It’s different for everybody, I suppose, but something about being told what to do and when to do it offends my soul. Maybe that’s why I hate working for other people. I do it, though, the way most other people do it. There are people who are happy to be told what to do at work, what to watch when they get home, how to perform in the bedroom, and they’re content with being mediocre.

I don’t understand. I hate being told what to do and I’ll do the opposite just for spite. If someone asks, I’m likely to bend over backwards to help but a bitchy email or a passive aggressive sigh will just piss me off. Often, I’ll make a point to call out the behavior for what it is and that makes me…unpopular with certain people.

There are a few shows I’ll watch when I feel I can afford the time away from pursuing my goals but mostly I dislike television and movies. For various reasons, I’m coming to loathe video games as a time suck and a form of chains to keep people content with what they have, where they are and the lack of control they have over their lives. And it’s a lack of control because they’ve given it up, they’ve chosen to remain where they are and numb themselves with the small accomplishments of the pixels on the screen.

I don’t know, maybe I’ll feel differently when I’m making enough to get away from the job that is slowly sucking the life out of me one bitchy, passive aggressive email at a time.

500 words written today, break to write the blog post and then back at it. Should probably have dinner at some point, too.

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